By Lissa (Yogyananda) Fountain, Yogaratna

I had two choices when I was diagnosed with cancer. I could be miserable and just try to gut it out. Or I could harness the power of Divine revelation.

A few weeks before, Gurudevi had suggested I look more closely at my fear of death. It had been running me my whole life. But now this fear had begun provoking panic attacks.

What came next was Divine perfection. I received a serious breast cancer diagnosis. “Curing me” would require surgery and 14 months of rigorous treatment, including chemotherapy and radiation.

Yet “healing me” became an inside job, fueled by Consciousness. I decided to embrace the teachings of yoga like never before and put them into action.

Of course I didn’t get there alone. A beloved Guru sister, a cancer survivor herself, guided me weekly through the process. She helped me see what a gift cancer was: an opportunity for a profound purification of body, mind and soul. But first, I had to learn to accept that nothing would be on “my schedule.”

What a difference radical acceptance makes! From confusion grew clarity. From fear, gratitude blossomed and kept rippling into more and more waves of bliss.

It was as if I took a magic carpet ride into the unknown skies of my own Self. Every day, I discovered each moment could be made holy as I looked through Shiva’s eyes.

The infusion lab became my temple. My oncology nurse, a Divine priestess. I began my first treatment with out-loud japa, of course. She chimed in: “Oh I know that mantra: I bow to my own Self.” A yoga miracle!

It also became a sweet, intimate time with my ever-present husband. At the last round of chemo, I taped a flower on the infusion bag, with great honor and respect for its role in my healing.

Daily Embodyment^® sessions grounded me in Consciousness. Weekly acupuncture balanced my immune system. And as the chemo killed cells, three hours of Ujjayi Pranayama re-plenished my body with more prana. 

My meditations deepened. I taught my Zoom Svaroopa^® yoga classes throughout my treatments. Retaining that normalcy was a real spirit booster. It seemed that everywhere, everyone was touched by this miracle called yoga.

My doctor has proclaimed NED (no evidence of disease). I am humbled by the cocoon of love and Grace that surrounded me in my time of need. These yoga practices are pure alchemy.

The scary can become a profound opening. The dross of something like cancer can transmute into the gold of Consciousness awareness.

Now I want only to live and serve from a place of inner knowing. Fear of death no longer runs me in the same way. I am at peace.

It is said, “You never know what life will bring.” Yet yoga promises that you will know who you are while in the midst of it all. And that, for me, is everything.