By Madelyn (Maanasaa) Jablon 

There were two reasons why I hesitated to sign up for the New Year’s Shaktipat Retreat.  First, I was feeling “out of practice.”  I had attended the autumn Shaktipat for many years.  When the pandemic upset this routine, I felt unanchored.  

Second, I wondered if it was necessary to receive Shaktipat more than once.  I knew that Shaktipat initiated the awakening of Kundalini.  If she was awakened at my first Shaktipat retreat, did she need to be awakened again?  Had life’s experiences hit the snooze button?  The New Year’s Retreat provided answers. 

Although I have a daily practice, I am curious when other yogis describe their Shaktipat experiences.  They speak of inner lights, spine-tingling energy and love unrivaled.  I hoped to have these experiences and prepared for the retreat with a week of intensive practices — meditation, asana and Ujjayi.  

When Gurudevi, giving Shaktipat by touch, hovers near me, my feverish repetition of mantra crescendos.  I pray, “please let me feel SOMETHING!”  The moment arrives.  Gurudevi places her hand on my forehead.  Nothing. 

In our sharing session, Swami Samvidaananda’s voice echoed off the walls of my bottomless hole of despair.  “We have time for one more yogi to describe their Shaktipat experience.  Maanasaa, please come up.”

I said, “I experienced the undulating rhythmic vibrations of the universe”.  

This time, I lost my old skepticism about Shaktipat.  I gained the ability to hear the percussion band of the universe: da-dum-da-dum; da-dum-da-dum.  

Gurudevi says it is always resounding.