By Agnes (Aikya) Hetherington

I was startled when I made a discovery about Gurudevi’s teachings. At first, I thought she was telling us many different things.

Yet I have realized over time that she has one single message for us. This message is vaster than the ocean, even beyond the beyond. And she is completely dedicated to helping us hear her message and know its truth experientially.

For me, the focal point of this dedication is her Swami Sunday discourse. Joining together in community with other seekers is both joyful and vital.

The long chant at the beginning propels me into a more receptive state. It shifts me from outward-focused busyness to an interior gaze. The silent pause after the chanting allows me to notice the change.

Hearing a personal story from the emcee illuminates another seeker’s journey. Hearing about their breakthroughs, large or small, encourages me on my path.

Then comes the sense of anticipation as Gurudevi begins her discourse. Will it be fiery, gentle, serious, funny, or all of the above? Sometimes I get scolded for being half-hearted with my practices. Other times I feel bathed in glory as one of the few who have chosen this path.

I can never predict whether I will even hear Gurudevi’s discourse. I might be laser focused all the way through, drinking in every word. Or I might pass in after a few minutes and miss all of it. Sometimes her words bypass my ears and mind and go straight into my heart.

Meditation afterwards is equally unpredictable. If I pass in, Kundalini pushes me into a deep forward bend, trying to release my tailbone. Other times she sends random thoughts whirling through my mind.

This is not the kind of enlightenment breakthrough that I once imagined. Yet I continue showing up for Satsangs. Why? Because Gurudevi has taught me that it is the showing up consistently that gets you there.